Remember when you started to suffer? Recognize that it was when you became thoughtful?
Thought, Consciousness, Time, Awareness, Intellect, Suffering. There is no odd one out.
J Krishnamurti said: "Thought is time. ... Time is the psychological enemy of man."
But what is "man" without thought and awareness of time?
Again: "Whatever thought does it breeds misery, sorrow, conflict, and when thought realizes that, it will come to an end by itself, the vicious circle is broken; thought, which means time, has come to an end." (JK)
And he said: "Seeing all this, that thought is the result of memory, of collected experience which is very limited, ... and seeing that the pursuit of the future creates time; seeing all this, surely it is obvious that thought must be suspended." (JK, emphasis mine)
The entire gamut of spiritual practices becomes transparent when you realize that the goal is to do away with thought.
I reached this realization 5 years back. Since I was incapable of doing that for a continued period of time, I gravitated towards actualism, which was even more radical in that it wanted to do away with the affective faculty altogether. Whereas spirituality revels in the bliss of the unexamined life, actualism revels in total examination.
"In my investigations into life, ... I first started by examining thought, thoughts and thinking ... then very soon moved on to examining feelings (first the emotions and then the deeper feelings). When I dug down into these passions and calentures (into the core of ‘my’ being then into ‘being’ itself)" (Richard, AFT Website)
Actualism appealed to my intellect, but I didn't realize then that if I was incapable of living as the spirit, I would be incapable of living as the senses too. The reason is the same for both inabilities: my awareness, my intellect is too strong to be submerged in either feelings or sensuality.
If ever Actualism becomes part of Hinduism (the all-embracing religion), it will surely be called Indriya Yoga (To Be One with the Senses, To BE the senses). Heh.
Spirituality is to live as feelings, Actualism is to live as the senses. For both, the only bliss worth its name is timeless bliss.
Time is the Enemy.
"I have no plans at all for the future." (Richard's Journal)
By now, it shouldn't come as a surprise.
(to be continued)