... Our capacity for suffering is the necessary concomitant of our capacity for commitment, caring and loving. Were we creatures of indifferent or dull sensibilities, our susceptibility to pain would be drastically reduced. But to be committed and to care and thus to feel deeply, is to be involved in relationships or ventures that do not always turn out in ways we hope for or expect. Such involvements can profoundly enrich our lives, but they also contain the seeds of disappointment and loss. To have persons and purposes for which to live and willingly to dedicate ourselves to them with intensity of concern, is also to run the risk of losing them or failing to attain them, or of getting hurt in the process of serving them. But only in this way can we hope to have things worth living for.The next time somebody tells you to remain detached, to just do "one's dharma" without attachment to results, to have no desires and fears, you might want to ask him whether, when he makes love to his wife, his wife knows that he is just fulfilling his duty.
No attachment, no suffering. Vigorous nod, eh?
No attachment, no passion. Not too bad, is it?
No attachment, no motivation. A little shake of the head, non?
No attachment, no commitment. Getting it now, yes?
Desire, Attachment, Passion, Motivation, Commitment, Suffering. You want out?
A seeker goes into an ashram to ask his handicapped guru how to remove a thorn from his foot. The guru hacks his leg and throws it away. Both are happy.
Walking and reaching a real-world destination is never the motivation of the narcissist seeker. The removal of the thorn is, whatever the cost. Whatever the cost.