tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post8462177127395926609..comments2024-03-04T22:54:13.447+05:30Comments on Remains of the Day: एक बज़्मUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-73916127540944942652009-08-16T22:42:26.033+05:302009-08-16T22:42:26.033+05:30Di:
Pesh hai kalam e shahenshah e nazm (besharta k...Di:<br />Pesh hai kalam e shahenshah e nazm (besharta kanchi waale ki kanchi na chali)<br /><br />Devouring Time, blunt thou the lion's paws,<br />And make the earth devour her own sweet brood;<br />Pluck the keen teeth from the fierce tiger's jaws,<br />And burn the long-lived phoenix in her blood;<br />Make glad and sorry seasons as thou fleets,<br />And do whate'er thou wilt, swift-footed Time,<br />To the wide world and all her fading sweets;<br />But I forbid thee one most heinous crime:<br />O, carve not with thy hours my love's fair brow,<br />Nor draw no lines there with thine antique pen;<br />Him in thy course untainted do allow<br />For beauty's pattern to succeeding men.<br /> Yet, do thy worst, old Time: despite thy wrong,<br /> My love shall in my verse ever live young.<br /><br />Aap ka UllooJarnailnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-12377213095040766602009-08-07T10:03:50.049+05:302009-08-07T10:03:50.049+05:30Yahan to achha khasa kavi darbar jaari hai! Suhan ...Yahan to achha khasa kavi darbar jaari hai! Suhan allah!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-85231859788520269892009-07-21T17:40:29.769+05:302009-07-21T17:40:29.769+05:30The elder Bachhan never touched a drop of liquor i...The elder Bachhan never touched a drop of liquor in his life. When questioned he gave the immortal reply:<br /><br />मैं कायस्थ, कुलोधाभव मेरे पुरखों ने इतना ढाला<br />मेरे तन के लहु में है पिछत्तर प्रतिशत हाला<br />पुश्तैनी अधिकार मुझे है मदिरालय के आँगन पर<br />मेरे दादा परदादा के हाथ बिकी थी यह मधुशालाAtingranoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-17478277445697730632009-07-21T17:16:00.437+05:302009-07-21T17:16:00.437+05:30Some blogs don't accept ananymous comments---i...Some blogs don't accept ananymous comments---it is their own choice. That too is the privelege of moderation.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-14803998761780316072009-07-21T16:57:10.355+05:302009-07-21T16:57:10.355+05:30Anonymity of comments serves a definite purpose si...Anonymity of comments serves a definite purpose since it gives a greater comfort zone and freedom, provided it is not misused.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-24130870279893166292009-07-21T16:15:51.923+05:302009-07-21T16:15:51.923+05:30Yes, anonymous comments are legitimate (till they ...Yes, anonymous comments are legitimate (till they are made illegal) so long as they do not stoop low.Thindishnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-55727937770753546302009-07-21T15:00:53.882+05:302009-07-21T15:00:53.882+05:30Anonymous 1.56:
You have a point of view but outr...Anonymous 1.56:<br /><br />You have a point of view but outright condemnation as banal is perhaps unfair if not anti-constructive---as the poster asserts he is neither bidding for a nobel or ratna.<br /><br />Defeatism/effeteness as a fashion tends to pervade large segments of Urdu and Hindi and Indian literature( Sarat, Batalvi) but within this limit Ghalib is certainly a philosophical and literary giant and world-class, transcending his time and place.<br /><br />Anonymous and pseudonymous comments are accepted and need not be ostracised particularly.<br /><br />.Tratisacnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-80999742203184473492009-07-21T13:56:33.315+05:302009-07-21T13:56:33.315+05:30banal : trite; without freshness or originality; c...banal : trite; without freshness or originality; commonplace; stale; usual<br /><br />The poem begins with a premise of a quest of an ideal world/situation which ends at a whining note of failure. It is written in romantic vein of failure and quest becoming the redeeming feature of the protagonist, a victim syndrome in place, some thing Mirza Ghalib specializes in as the poster has given a refered to him as an inspiration in the comments. Nida Fazli's ghazal ' kabhi kisi ko...'' is again in a defeatist mood for being a misfit in the present world, trying to find El dorado, and missing both in the end. Since such experiments have been done several times and worded better, the poem post , in my opnion, is banal and especially when the poster had posted Dear and Duck story previously. <br /><br />as a feedback on poetic diction:<br />'lalsa' would be better if it were ' khawaish', as the former is a typical hindi language word, sticking out in a poem with a urdu flavour. Sixth line should end as ' bawal ne ho' to give it a better 'rythm'.<br /><br />posting comments anonymously is accpetable on blogsphere and valid criticism ought to be taken as it is and not ascribed any malafide intentions.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-18355256214464697392009-07-21T07:02:33.257+05:302009-07-21T07:02:33.257+05:30Seems like everyone else is quoting Madhushala and...Seems like everyone else is quoting Madhushala and not giving credit to the original writer....plagarizers....all of you (LOL).<br /><br />Here is "my" (fav) contribution<br /><br />याद न आए दूखमय जीवन इससे पी लेता हाला,<br />जग चिंताओं से रहने को मुक्त, उठा लेता प्याला,<br />शौक, साध के और स्वाद के हेतु पिया जग करता है,<br />पर मै वह रोगी हूँ जिसकी एक दवा है मधुशाला।।७८।<br /><br />Harman, you need to put up a blog on Madhushala....seems like lot of interest out there. Big B did a blog post on it recently...it was great!Dihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11941540292009122291noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-54855714372128174012009-07-21T06:43:45.028+05:302009-07-21T06:43:45.028+05:30धर्म ग्रन्थ सब जला चुकी है, जिस के अंतर की ज्वाला
...धर्म ग्रन्थ सब जला चुकी है, जिस के अंतर की ज्वाला<br />मंदिर-मस्जिद-गिरजे, सबको तोड़ चुका है जो मतवाला<br />पंडित, मोमिन, पादरियों के फंदों को जो काट चुका<br />कर सकती है आज उसी का स्वागत मेरी मधुशालाHarmanjit Singhhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14714797381673153973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-50241859163915086092009-07-21T03:43:56.705+05:302009-07-21T03:43:56.705+05:30What a lovely poem!What a lovely poem!Amarjit, LAnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-58839147103201388942009-07-20T23:05:25.611+05:302009-07-20T23:05:25.611+05:30Bhindi:
Are you sure its Faiz cause Faiz was a com...Bhindi:<br />Are you sure its Faiz cause Faiz was a committed leftist and clear enough goals.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-32636045625028399212009-07-20T22:13:20.726+05:302009-07-20T22:13:20.726+05:30Neend bhi khuli na thi ki hai dhoop dhal gayi,
Pa...Neend bhi khuli na thi ki hai dhoop dhal gayi, <br />Paon jab talak uthe ki zindagi fisal gayi, <br />Paat-paat jhar gaye ki shaakh-shaakh jal gayi, <br />Chah to nikal saki na par umar nikal gayi. <br /><br />Geet ashk ban gaye, <br />chhand ho dafan gaye, <br />Saath ke sabhi diye dhuan-dhuan pehen gaye, <br />Aur hum jhuke-jhuke, <br />Mod par ruke-ruke, <br />Umar ke chadhaav ka utaar dekhte rahe, <br />Karvan guzar gaya, Gubar dekhte rahe!<br /><br />NeerajAndeanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-28546938778458235332009-07-20T21:04:06.443+05:302009-07-20T21:04:06.443+05:30यम आयेगा साकी बनकर साथ लिए काली हाला,
पी न होश में...यम आयेगा साकी बनकर साथ लिए काली हाला,<br />पी न होश में फिर आएगा सुरा-विसुध यह मतवाला,<br />यह अंितम बेहोशी, अंतिम साकी, अंतिम प्याला है,<br />पथिक, प्यार से पीना इसको फिर न मिलेगी मधुशाला।Readsmnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-32280786562887252462009-07-20T17:18:47.924+05:302009-07-20T17:18:47.924+05:30लाल सुरा की धार लपट सी कह न इसे देना ज्वाला,
फेनिल...लाल सुरा की धार लपट सी कह न इसे देना ज्वाला,<br />फेनिल मदिरा है, मत इसको कह देना उर का छाला,<br />दर्द नशा है इस मदिरा का विगत स्मृतियाँ साकी हैं,<br />पीड़ा में आनंद जिसे हो, आए मेरी मधुशाला।।१४।Bersouc, Keylongnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-47333257316422003162009-07-20T16:55:12.661+05:302009-07-20T16:55:12.661+05:30A well balanced and expressive poem. Hardly banal!...A well balanced and expressive poem. Hardly banal! Here's one from Faiz with an unnecessary translation:<br /><br />Maqaam Faiz koi raah mein jacha hi nahin<br />Jo kue yaar se nikle to sue daar chale<br /><br />I could never find a goal to identify with. Emerging from the beloved's street , I landed straight at the gallows.Bhindi S. Gulati, Kapurthalanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-84042297421873275962009-07-20T09:54:39.309+05:302009-07-20T09:54:39.309+05:30This is a poem written as an experiment in a speci...This is a poem written as an experiment in a specific rhythm.<br /><br />Its contents, though topical, are of a "complaining" kind, and that is usually the case with such kind of poetry, e.g. (not equating myself in anyway) Ghalib's "Hazaaron Khwahishen Aisi..." or Unknown-to-me's "Kabhi Kisi ko Muqammal..."Harmanjit Singhhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14714797381673153973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-1832388691106303002009-07-19T18:20:48.414+05:302009-07-19T18:20:48.414+05:30khanjeer = dagger
bazm = a poem
ranjish = hurt, co...khanjeer = dagger<br />bazm = a poem<br />ranjish = hurt, complaint, sorrow<br /><br />and you are right about bawaal, it does mean a riot of some kind.Harmanjit Singhhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14714797381673153973noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-32857469955553413212009-07-19T10:13:14.895+05:302009-07-19T10:13:14.895+05:30जुस्तजू हो तो सफ़र ख़त्म कहाँ होता है ,
यूं...जुस्तजू हो तो सफ़र ख़त्म कहाँ होता है ,<br />यूं तो हर मोड़ पे मंजिल का गुमान होता है.<br />_______________________________<br /><br />मंजलों से बेगाना, आज भी सफ़र मेरा <br />रात बेसहर मेरी, दर्द बेअसर मेरा <br />_______________________________<br /><br /><br />-Ghulam Rabbani Tabansamarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08374003205470265140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-81101913809074819122009-07-19T07:33:19.027+05:302009-07-19T07:33:19.027+05:30Arrey wah, aap toh kavi bhi ho!!!
I can't say...Arrey wah, aap toh kavi bhi ho!!!<br /><br />I can't say good work, because I couldn't understand many of the hindi/urdu type of words.<br /><br />And with regards to comment one, I have to say this. That while you have the balls to publish a negative comment, he is hiding in anonymity!!!! This is certainly not banal. It was quite good (Whatever I understood of it).Dihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11941540292009122291noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7037385.post-44977657574820204912009-07-18T21:39:25.207+05:302009-07-18T21:39:25.207+05:30banal...
especially after dear and duck!banal...<br /><br />especially after dear and duck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com